Sunday, July 30, 2006

Giving Up

Despite my resolution not to call, I find myself calling Mom to tell her that I'm almost back to California and will see her soon.
"Hi, Mom. I'm in Flagstaff."
"I wanted to be there. I wanted to meet you in Colorado."
Oh dear. I didn't want to get into a conversation like this.
"But I have to drive across the desert, Mom," I argue. "It's really hot."
"Oh, it is? Well, I'll give it up another year. Every year I give it up." She sounds tired, resigned.
"Oh well, maybe another year," I concede. "I'll see you soon, after dinner. I should be there by 7 pm."
"Good! I want to see you."
"But I won't be there until after dinner," I warn, hoping she won't become agitated waiting for me.
It's so hard to feel her longing to be in Colorado again and know that it will probably never happen.

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