Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Time to Increase Private Caregiver Hours?

I had a flash of insight just now--or maybe just another dumb idea like putting her on hospice, firing Roze Room, starting up with another hospice, etc.

Maybe we should increase her private caregiver time to 8 hours every day again, not two days a week.

However, I'm not sure how long she can pay for this. Not a year!

I went there at 1:30 pm today and found her lying in bed, facing the wall.

She always begs to be put back to bed in the daytime now... but I don't let her do that.

I got her up into her chair, and today as yesterday she kept saying, "Don't let me fall!"

"You're not falling," I say. "You're in your chair. Here I am."

She grips onto me and doesn't want me to let go or leave. Because her eyes are closed, she doesn't know if I'm there unless she is touching me.

But when I start coughing, she tells me to leave, take care of myself. So she is somewhat sane, and perhaps more sane than I am.

A friend who died 5 years ago told me ten days before dying that she had frequent sensations while in bed of falling (that feeling we all have had in bed a few times, our mind not anchored down by sight or hearing before we rustle the covers and remember where we are).

Mom may be having that sensation. In any case, she's very clingy. And of course, controlling.

What do you think?

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